Blood Battle 2012: Kaitlyn vs.”The Hag”


*Caution: This a graphic tale*

The setting @ 10:50 PM/ 22:50:

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WHAT. A. BEAUT.
You have to repush the water button every minute, and every five minutes the light sensor goes off.

For those of you who know me even semi-well, you’d know that I hate shaving more than almost anything. Now imagine me trying to shave my lengthy legs in that closet- pretty humorous right? New player: brand new disposable razor. OUCH. This caused for some lovely razor burn and serious cuts, so much so that it was nothing but blood going down the drain.

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Just a nice collage of 4 of the 9 cuts. This allowed for some pretty awesome sporting of the band-aids.

I had nothing but a towel to stop the bleeding, and there was nothing in the shower so I decided I’d try and wait it out in the shower until some of the bleeding slowed down.

20 MINUTES LATER:
*BANG BANG BANG*
The door is viciously being tried to be opened up
“Aldij#@#$(*%AKJKJ#LKN@(*RAHKH@)$%*^&IHAKJG(&@#*$HAJKNALIH#*FJ*$H*$&%HALR*#0”
(Okay, so as far as I know, it wasn’t swear words. But it was all in German (?) so it was the same to me)

My reaction:
“Uhhhh… I’m bleeding to death, maybe they’ll just go away. If they’re waiting for a shower the other one is open.”

Foreign Angry Person:
“Aja(#&ALF(#KVHG(*@*$HGHALCK(#URJ*#JF*GHA(GHANI#*#*GHANLAF*”
*BANG KICK BANG SLAP PUNCH HIT HEAD BUTT BANG*
-for a very ear blasting 3 minutes

My second reaction:
“Who the heck do they think they are? People are sleeping! I guess I should get out and try not to get the floor too bloody and see if there is a fire or something.”

I then proceed to get dressed (just a shirt, my legs were too bloody to get anything on) and open the door. Let’s pause for a moment to use our imaginations: imagine the ugliest, frumpiest, typical old German lady/Hag you have ever imagined. Take it down one notch, and is what greeted me at the door in a great nightie.

Hag:
something in German while points to a non-existent watch”

Me:
“is she seriously getting mad at me for showering at 11:20 in a youth hostel?”
I idiotically point to my towel covered legs as I make a nice puddle of blood on the tiled floor trying to explain that obviously I was having some issues.

Hag:
points to my legs, says something in German, laughs at my legs (not really, but I know she wanted to), keeps pointing at her watch and yelling at me in German. Then spits at me and goes into the room next to the shower.”

Me:
“Band-aids sounds nice.”
48 hours later- and I’m still totally and utterly confused as to what she was yelling at me for, and why she woke up all the rooms in our area to do it.

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Stupid Hag. Stay in your cave.

I may have not showered since because of pure fright.

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